What I wouldn’t give for some.
This weekend marks 6 months for my baby boy – more on that later, which is just hard to believe….but it has also been 6 full months (beyond that if you count my pregnancy) where I have had a full nights sleep. Lately I have been up three times a night to nurse my little guy and usually he goes right back to sleep after.
It wouldn’t be so bad if I didn’t have to walk down the hallway to him or worry about him waking Little Magoo with his crying. I will say I have absolutely finally reached the point where I am sheerly exhausted on a daily basis and have finally just had it – the sleep deprivation is getting to me, while I am glad that I have reached the 1/2 way mark in breastfeeding.
Don’t get me wrong, I love laying next to my little man at night, the quiet moments listening to him gulp and breathe and his body laying so close to mine – I wouldn’t change that for the world. I wished one of my kids would get the hang of sleeping through the night early on, seeing as Little Magoo never did. As one of my friends who nurses refered to sleep deprivation as a form of torture and it really is! I’m moody, depressed, exhausted – I go from angry one second to crying the next – and have a toddler to deal with on a daily basis, so a nap is out of the question for me and please don’t ask about my energy level…no one understands what I am going through…at least not unless you have gone through 6 months of sleeping 3-4 hours then waking for an hour at night…pure torture.
Let’s hope Baby Magoo gets the hang of it soon! I keep hoping that sleep is around the corner.