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Archive for December, 2009

New Year

I got some great news from my maternal-fetal specialist! He wants to see my pregnancy go to 39/40 weeks! Then my OB/GYN can talk about induction. I am seriously so so happy – I want my baby to stay in there as long as he needs to! The specialist said things look as best as they possibly could with my amniosictisis results and he couldn’t ask for a better isoimmunized situation – I never have to go back and see him again! I couldn’t be more thankful for him watching my little one so closely.

I get to continue with my non-stress tests to monitor Baby Magoo, who was being quite uncooperative yesterday at the OB’s office. He decided to sleep during the NST, so a biophysical ultrasound was in order. Much to my surprise, I was contracting during my NST. Leave it to me to not know what a contraction feels like…for a couple of days my abdomen had been feeling tight here or there, but I just attributed it to Baby Magoo pushing on me funny – was I wrong!

Very exciting news to me for ringing in the new year…

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So Sorry…

Sorry I haven’t blogged in a while – I had full on intended on telling you all about my first turkey roasting experience…maybe I’ll post that later – it was interesting, the brining process I tried and all. Not so much a fan of turkey roasting though.

I have been so utterly and completely overwhelmed lately and my lack of sleep at night is awful. I toss and turn trying to get comfortable and then snore myself awake and then have to use the bathroom…before I know it, it is morning again and I have to chase Little Magoo around all day, between time outs and making meals and him wanting me to get off my lazy butt and play with him…it is exhausting. My house is gathering dust and dust bunnies by the minute and I feel I have zero time to get anything done.

Yesterday I had an amniocentesis done for Baby Magoo, to see how he is doing. If there is distress and lung maturity there, he may be here in a week. If there is distress and no lung maturity, he may be here in two weeks and if the results are spot on (which I expect them to be) and there is no distress and lung maturity…three weeks he will probably be here! This, plus dealing with the idea of leaving Little Magoo, Mr. Magoo having to work, the holidays, doctors appointments up the wazoo for non-stress tests and prenatal visits…everything – I feel like my head is just spinning.

Part of me doesn’t know how I am going to survive…but really I have no choice but to.

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First Haircut

Today Mr. Magoo gave me a hand getting some things done around the house…one of those things was finally cutting Little Magoo’s hair.

We set him up in his high chair in front on the TV, to keep him occupied. Although he’s never had much hair and it is still fine and thin..the front was getting a little long and some strands hung over his ears…and his sweet little baby curls were getting far too long in the back. Like, rats-tail long…you remember that look? Ick.

I started by wetting his hair…and I have to admit I was terribly nervous. I probably cut the back too short, but I wanted to be sure to get those little curls for his baby book.

It doesn’t look horribly to me…but I am so sad I don’t have those little curls to run my fingers through anymore. 😦

All cleaned up…to me, he still looks like my sweet little baby boy….

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Wish List

What are some things you have on your Christmas Wish List?

Honestly, I rarely have anything on mine anymore…but this year, I have a few things to ask of Santa.

1. A healthy baby.

2. For Mr. Magoo to land a good steady job with amazing health insurance…and prefereably a job in the field of what he wants to do and would be happy doing.

3. For Baby Magoo to come on his own terms.

4. For me to go into labor on my own. I’ve been thinking a lot about this lately. I somewhat feel robbed and betrayed by my own body, having never gone into labor on my own, other than my water breaking with Little Magoo…I thought I’d get the chance this time around, rather than being induced with Pitocin, but sadly, it looks like my body will be forced into motion, one way or the other.

5. To win the lottery.

6. A new camera lens(es).

7. Lots of picture frames.

I don’t think I am asking for much.

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But my dear, it’s so delightful.

As long as you love me so…(so much so to get my overly pregnant butt outside with you)

…let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.

Love ya, Little Magoo.

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E.

I thought I was done with it and the odds of my Anti-E titers going up were pretty slim. I was hopeful. But sadly, my titers rose to at least 1:16 vs. 1:8 where the doctors wanted them to be.

I got a message on my machine this morning to give my OB/GYN a call. “Routine.” I thought, “They must have gotten the results of my last blood draw, but I am sure everything is fine.” I called them back and the nurse got onto the phone with me.

“Hi, we got the results of your last titers back…and unfortunately that have risen, so the doctor would like you to go see the Maternal-Fetal Specialist as soon as you can.”

My heart sunk. “OK…”, I said, I could feel myself welling up. No one likes to know their baby is in danger, let alone, from their own mother’s body.

“Can you go today?”

“Yes, absolutely.”

“OK, we’ll set up the appointment and give you a call back.”

I bawled.

Before I knew it I was racing around the house getting ready and praying my parents made it on time to watch Little Magoo, so Mr. Magoo and I could get to the ultrasound for the fetal brain doppler on time.

Everything measured and looked great. Baby Magoo is perfect so far (measuring at 5lbs 14oz, with a head of hair) – and the artery in his brain is a-okay with pumping his blood, with no sight of anemia present, which is what the Anti-E Antibody can cause, when attacking the fetus…which could further result in fetal cardiac arrest. The Specialist commented on how wonderful Baby Magoo was, holding nice and still so he could get the perfect look.

Now I go for at least two more ultrasound of the same, followed by an amniocentesis…which I am scared to death of. I do fine with needles and other people, but the thought of a 3 inch needle going through my belly to where my baby is, scares the crap out of me. The amnio will tell the Doctor how well Baby Magoo is doing – because evidentially come 35 weeks, amnio is really the only way to tell. Baby Magoo will also be tested to see if his lungs are fully developed and if so, I will be induced/he will be taken early.

It is wonderful that I am having such great care …but I am so scared, for my child, having to come into this world early. I don’t like the idea of it at all. I don’t like the idea of being induced. I know it is for the best, but it is so stressful. I’d like him to come on his own, when he is ready…but it does not look like things will happen that way.

I was also very saddened by the fact that the Doctor informed Mr. Magoo and I, that we must think long and hard about having any future children, since any subsequent pregnancies will have a higher risk of being affected by the Anti-E Antibody, in my body. It seemed somewhat final in his tone. I don’t like that…the selfish part of me feels that our family may not be complete, I don’t want to think about it…but how could I put another baby through this…and part of me can’t help but feel it is all my fault – my body and my blood working against me.

Mr. Magoo and I have both felt the weight of the stress today and are still absorbing everything we were told today.

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